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Monday, September 28, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
If Only :(
Yesterday was like any other day... I finished my work at around 4.30, took the office shuttle and reached the station ten minutes before my train... that's pretty much what happens every day, day after day... those ten minutes are the longest part of the day for me... I can't bring myself to do anything in those ten minutes... and yet I try each day... yesterday was no different... here I was trying to immerse myself into a book I was carrying, earnestly hoping for the train to come in early....
And then there was this man, an American who sat right next to me on a nearby bench... I didn't give him a second glance.. I disregarded him as just another person in the stream of strangers I see everyday... Not until he asked if he could find a pay phone, not to me... to the crowd in general... I looked up then and replied "I don't know"... I really didn't... Then I heard somebody say "down the stairs, on the opposite side" or something like that.... Thinking that he might miss his train, he again asked everyone there in general whether he could use any of ours phone and that he'd pay us... nobody looked up this time... my first instinct was to take out my mobile and help him out but then for some reason I kept quiet, staring into my book, reading nothing in particular... Everybody else also reacted in the same way... as if that man was invisible... as if we hadn't heard anything at all... he looked around hopefully to see if anybody was willing to let him use their phone... but nothing... SILENCE... all this happened very quickly... but those couple of minutes became excruciating for me... the longer I kept quiet, the harder it became for me to say anything to him, to help him; it seemed as if I had frozen... And then out of nowhere a black woman came and he asked her directly for the favor and she gave him her mobile, he made a quick call, apparently to his wife and then returned it with many thanks to that lady...
If only...
If only I had not feared what would happen if the man turns out to be a rogue and does not return my handset or worse runs away with it.. If only I had not thought about what others sitting there would think if he indeed would have run away with it; what kind of a stupid girl is she giving out her things to strangers like that, that too in a foreign land.. If only I had the strength to help out that man, those genuine words of gratitude would have been for me...
And then I thought about the other people sitting there.. Is this weighing upon their conscience as much as it is on mine... would they be thinking about him as well, I guess not... But does just thinking about it later on make me a better person, I think not :(
I pray to God to give me the strength to be more human if I face such a situation ever again, even if I lose some of my possessions, atleast I won't have to spend unsettling nights thinking about what I could have done and what I did not !!
And then there was this man, an American who sat right next to me on a nearby bench... I didn't give him a second glance.. I disregarded him as just another person in the stream of strangers I see everyday... Not until he asked if he could find a pay phone, not to me... to the crowd in general... I looked up then and replied "I don't know"... I really didn't... Then I heard somebody say "down the stairs, on the opposite side" or something like that.... Thinking that he might miss his train, he again asked everyone there in general whether he could use any of ours phone and that he'd pay us... nobody looked up this time... my first instinct was to take out my mobile and help him out but then for some reason I kept quiet, staring into my book, reading nothing in particular... Everybody else also reacted in the same way... as if that man was invisible... as if we hadn't heard anything at all... he looked around hopefully to see if anybody was willing to let him use their phone... but nothing... SILENCE... all this happened very quickly... but those couple of minutes became excruciating for me... the longer I kept quiet, the harder it became for me to say anything to him, to help him; it seemed as if I had frozen... And then out of nowhere a black woman came and he asked her directly for the favor and she gave him her mobile, he made a quick call, apparently to his wife and then returned it with many thanks to that lady...
If only...
If only I had not feared what would happen if the man turns out to be a rogue and does not return my handset or worse runs away with it.. If only I had not thought about what others sitting there would think if he indeed would have run away with it; what kind of a stupid girl is she giving out her things to strangers like that, that too in a foreign land.. If only I had the strength to help out that man, those genuine words of gratitude would have been for me...
And then I thought about the other people sitting there.. Is this weighing upon their conscience as much as it is on mine... would they be thinking about him as well, I guess not... But does just thinking about it later on make me a better person, I think not :(
I pray to God to give me the strength to be more human if I face such a situation ever again, even if I lose some of my possessions, atleast I won't have to spend unsettling nights thinking about what I could have done and what I did not !!
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Culture Contrast !!
Couple of days back, I caught a glimpse of Aishwarya on the 'Oprah Winfrey Show' while I was youtubing aimlessly on the internet... fresh from her Cannes days (Devdas had just premiered at Cannes and had won immense international acclaim), she looked just as she always does, Gorgeous !! well, thats how Oprah introduced her anyway.. the most beautiful woman on earth n blah, blah, blah.... we are so used to it by now :)
What really caught my attention though was when she spoke on the topic of living with one's parents ... "while in India, its not something to even think about or consider, in the West however your parents would kick you out of the house after a certain age if you don't go by yourself... in India it signifies the family bonding and intimacy while in the West it epitomizes the inherent sense of independence ingrained in the people".... the cultural divide was so vividly apparent... I couldn't help but think of the charm both ways of being hold; in their own manner they are important to the people who follow them, people who are subtly but undoubtedly impacted by these ways of life... none is bad, I must say.. no culture should ever be termed as bad, especially just because we might not be a part of it.... In the end, we should be looking for a favorable fusion of entities, the best of all the worlds and create something worthwhile... right !!
What really caught my attention though was when she spoke on the topic of living with one's parents ... "while in India, its not something to even think about or consider, in the West however your parents would kick you out of the house after a certain age if you don't go by yourself... in India it signifies the family bonding and intimacy while in the West it epitomizes the inherent sense of independence ingrained in the people".... the cultural divide was so vividly apparent... I couldn't help but think of the charm both ways of being hold; in their own manner they are important to the people who follow them, people who are subtly but undoubtedly impacted by these ways of life... none is bad, I must say.. no culture should ever be termed as bad, especially just because we might not be a part of it.... In the end, we should be looking for a favorable fusion of entities, the best of all the worlds and create something worthwhile... right !!
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
The Pursuit of Happyness
Thats the ultimate reality... isn't it; after all the ups and downs, hope and despair, angst and relief.... this is what we are searching for; thats what we all are fighting for... HAPPINESS :)
All the other things and feelings are just pawns in this larger game, it might be possible for a variety of us to reach that finishing line in different ways... one might think that adventure makes him happy, some other would need flashy clothes and jewellery to make him feel the same way... Bottom line is... whatever it is that makes you happy... go get it and get it by yourself... achieve your inner contentment first so that you can multiply it manifolds and give it back to the world around you!!
All the other things and feelings are just pawns in this larger game, it might be possible for a variety of us to reach that finishing line in different ways... one might think that adventure makes him happy, some other would need flashy clothes and jewellery to make him feel the same way... Bottom line is... whatever it is that makes you happy... go get it and get it by yourself... achieve your inner contentment first so that you can multiply it manifolds and give it back to the world around you!!
Monday, September 21, 2009
Walk that Walk !!!
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
- Robert Frost
So many times, we feel like we are standing on a dead end, like there is no way ahead... no way out... it seems as if we alone are facing all the despair in the world... as if we would do better in anybody else's life except ours... all the while forgetting that we alone are responsible for what we are and what we can be... I know this is true for everybody who reads this...
Every other day we think about what all we have to do or what all we want to do, mentally charting out rigorous time tables and jam packed schedules but somehow we end up doing nothing... nothing at all.... the day just drags by with no end result !! What happens to us when we actually need to execute what we have planned, why don't we open our eyes at eight instead of mid-day, why don't we stop the endless episodes of f.r.i.e.n.d.s. (I seriously need to work on this one ;))... what happens to us when it really is the question of 'walk that walk' !!
Talk that talk but also walk that walk... otherwise the talk is pointless... It does not have to be long strides, baby steps also count... the idea is to get moving.. may be slowly but atleast steadily towards your goal... It will come in the end, it has to... and when it does you will cherish your belief in yourself....
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
- Robert Frost
So many times, we feel like we are standing on a dead end, like there is no way ahead... no way out... it seems as if we alone are facing all the despair in the world... as if we would do better in anybody else's life except ours... all the while forgetting that we alone are responsible for what we are and what we can be... I know this is true for everybody who reads this...
Every other day we think about what all we have to do or what all we want to do, mentally charting out rigorous time tables and jam packed schedules but somehow we end up doing nothing... nothing at all.... the day just drags by with no end result !! What happens to us when we actually need to execute what we have planned, why don't we open our eyes at eight instead of mid-day, why don't we stop the endless episodes of f.r.i.e.n.d.s. (I seriously need to work on this one ;))... what happens to us when it really is the question of 'walk that walk' !!
Talk that talk but also walk that walk... otherwise the talk is pointless... It does not have to be long strides, baby steps also count... the idea is to get moving.. may be slowly but atleast steadily towards your goal... It will come in the end, it has to... and when it does you will cherish your belief in yourself....
Friday, September 18, 2009
Phantom Limbs...
I am currently reading a novel by Stephen King, DUMA KEY; it got interesting just now after I've read like half of it... Thank God for that, my patience bubble was about to burst... But this is not what I will be writing about....
The book introduced me to a strange new concept of "Phantom Limbs", the take was supernatural but when I scrouged Wiki and the likes, I found it very much exists. Just something interesting I found to share with you, so here it goes....
"A phantom limb is the sensation that an amputated or missing limb (even an organ, like the appendix) is still attached to the body and is moving appropriately with other body parts. The missing limb often feels shorter and may feel as if it is in a distorted and painful position. Although not all phantom limbs are painful, patients will sometimes feel as if they are gesturing, feel itches, twitch, or even try to pick things up. "
Now, until recently, the dominant theory for cause of phantom limbs was irritation in the severed nerve endings (called "neuromas"). When a limb is amputated, many severed nerve endings are terminated at the remaining stump. These nerve endings can become inflamed, and were thought to send anomalous signals to the brain. These signals, being functionally nonsense, were thought to be interpreted by the brain as pain. Drugs, anti-depressants, Spinal Cord Stimulation (effective) are said to be some of the ways that are known to curb it, though people have gone to the extremes of getting a second amputation done.
Should I call it weird or supernatural or something which is just unexplored by science yet... I don't know, but it certainly is something to think about... what say !!!
The book introduced me to a strange new concept of "Phantom Limbs", the take was supernatural but when I scrouged Wiki and the likes, I found it very much exists. Just something interesting I found to share with you, so here it goes....
"A phantom limb is the sensation that an amputated or missing limb (even an organ, like the appendix) is still attached to the body and is moving appropriately with other body parts. The missing limb often feels shorter and may feel as if it is in a distorted and painful position. Although not all phantom limbs are painful, patients will sometimes feel as if they are gesturing, feel itches, twitch, or even try to pick things up. "
Now, until recently, the dominant theory for cause of phantom limbs was irritation in the severed nerve endings (called "neuromas"). When a limb is amputated, many severed nerve endings are terminated at the remaining stump. These nerve endings can become inflamed, and were thought to send anomalous signals to the brain. These signals, being functionally nonsense, were thought to be interpreted by the brain as pain. Drugs, anti-depressants, Spinal Cord Stimulation (effective) are said to be some of the ways that are known to curb it, though people have gone to the extremes of getting a second amputation done.
Should I call it weird or supernatural or something which is just unexplored by science yet... I don't know, but it certainly is something to think about... what say !!!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Relief !!!
Relief when we feel the cool air of our homes along with the soft ticking of the ceiling fan after we have escaped from the scorching sun.... relief when we finally get our exam results after the excruciatingly long wait and find out that we didn't do that badly after all.... relief when we ultimately make it for an interview after a particularly late morning and series of traffic jams.... whooffff !!!
Relief as a feeling is so very under-rated... you may feel sad or happy, angry or mischievous, frightened or embarassed... but people seldom say "I am relieved".... we might be using some manifestations of the word though, I cannot seem to think of any at the moment :)
What is relief by the way.... the feeling of the unbearable knot in your stomach dissolving instantly or your taut facial expressions loosening almost like at will or you not feeling like all arms and legs.... May be relief is the feeling of knowing that everyone around you is safe and sound.... that you are together to face any uncertainities of life...
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